I recently published the results of a survey of Feeling Good Podcast fans like yourself. The findings were overwhelmingly positive and illuminating. However, there were a few criticisms as well, like the excellent and thoughtful comments Rhonda and I will address in this podcast. I appreciate negative feedback, as this provides the greatest opportunities for growth and learning.
However, like most people, I sometimes find criticisms emotionally challenging and want to lash out, defending myself! Do you sometimes feel that way, too?
When I feel defensive, its because I think I have a “self” or some cherished “territory” that’s under attack. When I let go of this “self,” it can be incredibly liberating to find truth in a criticism and discover that the feedback is really coming from a trusted colleague or friend, rather than some enemy who is trying to destroy or defeat you!
Here’s what s/he wrote:
Dr. Burns, you seem to disregard healing modalities outside of CBT. CBT is wonderful and nobody teachers it better than Dr Burns—I believe that it is a foundational practice to well-being. However, working with difficult emotions is very important and not always well addressed through CBT alone.
Thinking CBT is the answer for most issues is loaded with cognitive distortions. Example–Discounting the Positive in other practices, All or Nothing Thinking, Magical Thinking, and seeing CBT as a “cure all.” In my personal healing journey CBT has been absolutely essential–as has self compassion, learning to let things go, inner child work, mindfulness, somatic awareness and more. I have noticed there has repeatedly been a dismissive tone for other valuable practices.
Obviously. the Feeling Good Podcast is about CBT and sticking to your expertise is essential. However, I would be careful not to disregard other healing practices that could potentially help someone out.
I have such respect for Dr Burns and his team-but your words carry weight- please be thoughtful about discounting other methods that could be helping someone.
Thank you, whoever you are, for this thought-provoking feedback. And you are SO RIGHT. Cognitive Therapy has value for some problems, but it is definitely NOT a panacea. In fact, no treatment is! The belief that you have THE ANSWER for everything is incredibly misguided but unfortunately, way too common in our field.
I have no doubt that many people have shared your concerns. Let us know what you think after you hear today’s podcast!
David and Rhonda
You can reach Dr. Burns at david@feelinggood.com. Dr. Rhonda Barovsky practices in Walnut Creek, California, and can be reached at rbarovsky@aol.com.
If you like our jingle music and would like to support the composer Brett Van Donsel, you may download it here.
* * *
There will be two more intensives for you this summer and fall! The SF program is starting soon, so act fast if you want to attend.
July 29 – August 1, 2019 South San Francisco four-day intensive Sponsored by Praxis
November 4 – 7, 2019 Atlanta, Georgia four-day intensive Sponsored by Praxis
The intensives are always THE BEST! I hope you can join me at one of these incredible events!
At my Stanford Tuesday training group this week, one of our members asked a super-important question, “Does David believe there is only one correct way to do things?” By way of coincidence, Rhonda and I recently recorded a podcast on this very topic, and it will be published on Monday. This is the title: “Is Cognitive Therapy a Cure-All for Everything?” You might enjoy it, and you’ll get my thinking on several controversial topics.
If you’re not yet a podcast fan, you and some of your patients might like them. Here’s an email I got just this morning from someone in Kosovo.
Dr. David,
Greetings from Kosovo. Your book has been a wonderful journey on my self-help regarding my anxieties, worries, and stress – so thank you very much. After reading the book I found out about the podcast (very recently) and ever since I started watching all of the episodes one by one from the very first one. The story of Marilyn has hit me deeply and has made me realize how irrational I am being about my problems – although they feel very real to me. However, seeing how Marilyn coped with her severe anxieties, mine went away almost instantly. I’m sending all my love to You, Matt and Marilyn. I have recommended your book and podcast to all of my friends.
Gratefully, Dea
As you can see, Dea actually experienced significant improvement just from listening to the live work with Marilyn. You or your patients might also find that my podcasts o books might greatly accelerate learning and recovery.
You can find a list of all the podcasts and show notes on my website. In addition, you will find a search function in the right-hand panel of every page. This makes my entire website searchable, which is super-convenient if you want to recommend certain kinds of podcasts to your patients, or if you are looking for self-help. For example, you can type in “Five Secrets of Effective Communication,” “Positive Distortions,” “Anxiety,” “Suicide Prevention,” or whatever you want, and some wonderful resources will pop right up!
david
* * *
And if you need training, CE credits, or just four days of training and personal refueling, attend one of my upcoming intensives. The Calgary program is coming up in two days but if you move fast, you can still register!
High-Speed Treatment of Depression and Anxiety Disorders—
Learn powerful new tools to boost your effectiveness in the treatment of depression and all of the anxiety disorders! Discover how TEAM-CBT can produce extremely rapid and lasting changes for your depressed and anxious clients—and for you.
This workshop will be experiential. You will have the chance to practice lots of innovative techniques in small groups and get immediate feedback so you can refine your skills. You’ll also have the chance to work on your own feelings of self-doubt so you can leave this workshop on a high, with renewed confidence and excitement about your clinical work.
This dynamic workshop offers:
State-of-the-art TEAM-CBT techniques for depression and all of the anxiety disorders.
Powerful new methods for the treatment of habits and addictions—your own and your clients’!
Innovativeresistance-busting techniques to boost patient motivation and eliminate “yes-butting.” Learn to pinpoint and eliminate the eight most common forms of therapeutic resistance.
Live demonstrations and video clips from actual therapy sessions.
Powerful Relapse Prevention Training for lasting results.
Lots of fun and the chance to get some much-needed emotional refueling!
The annual intensives are almost always the best workshops of the year. If you can join us this year, they will be even better!
This workshop has been approved for Levels 1 through 3 TEAM-CBT Certification
and is suitable for novice as well as highly experienced therapists.
Of course, you’ll get tons of CE credits as well.
The two intensives will be similar, but there are some differences that may be important to you.
Special features at this year’s South SF intensive
Sunny Choi will be speaking on “TEAM with Compassion.” Sunny spoke last year and was amazing, so he is returning, as they say, “by popular demand.” He describes incredible, high-speed TEAM therapy to populations with severe problems and extremely limited resources, including immigrants who do not speak English.
Dr. Jill Levitt will be joining me as co-therapist for the live demonstration on the evening of day 1. In past years, these dramatic live demos have provided tremendous opportunities for learning. If you have never seen Jill, this will be a real treat for you!
I will be joined by many expert helpers from the Feeling Good Institute who will help provide feedback for you during the many practice sessions.
There will be two amazing evening sessions to add depth to your training. You’ll be totally exhausted, but chock-full of incredible new skills and insights that can change the direction of your career and transform your personal life as well.
Special features at this year’s Calgary, Canada intensive
The three optional evening hikes / meals together will be a highlight for many. While hiking, you will have chances for personal work with David, Q and A, difficult case consultation, and additional practice with the new techniques you are learning.
If you don’t want to hike, you can enjoy your evenings with friends or family and refuel for the next day.
There will be a live demo on the morning of day 2. In past years, these live therapy sessions have been inspirational and wonderfully informative. Last year’s live therapy demonstration in Whistler was jaw-dropping!
And, as you probably know, Jack Hirose always puts on an amazing event, designed to provide you with maximum comfort, delight, and learning!
In both workshops, David promises to catapult at least 65% of the participants into a state of joyous enlightenment. Would you like to finally free yourself from feelings of self-doubt and endless obsessions about whether you’re “good enough?” Check out the registration links now!
Feeling good feels wonderful! You owe it to yourself to feel good! Join me in
Whether you’re a patient, therapist, or general citizen, you might enjoy my interview on The Cognitive Revolution on Stanford’s radio station KZSU, published yesterday.
It was an incredibly fun and energetic interview. They plan to re-broadcast it to let more people know about the benefits of CBT, as well as the new TEAM-CBT.
Here is a link to the interview: http://www.modernteknews.com. The radio station reported that they got a strong and positive response to the program, and I hope you like it, too!
* * *
And if you need training, CE credits, or just four days of fantastic training and personal refueling, attend one of my summer intensives. The Calgary program is coming up REALLY SOON but if you move fast, you can still register!
High-Speed Treatment of Depression and Anxiety Disorders—
Learn powerful new tools to boost your effectiveness in the treatment of depression and all of the anxiety disorders! Discover how TEAM-CBT can produce extremely rapid and lasting changes for your depressed and anxious clients—and for you.
This workshop will be experiential. You will have the chance to practice lots of innovative techniques in small groups and get immediate feedback so you can refine your skills. You’ll also have the chance to work on your own feelings of self-doubt so you can leave this workshop on a high, with renewed confidence and excitement about your clinical work.
This dynamic workshop offers:
State-of-the-art TEAM-CBT techniques for depression and all of the anxiety disorders.
Powerful new methods for the treatment of habits and addictions—your own and your clients’!
Innovativeresistance-busting techniques to boost patient motivation and eliminate “yes-butting.” Learn to pinpoint and eliminate the eight most common forms of therapeutic resistance.
Live demonstrations and video clips from actual therapy sessions.
Powerful Relapse Prevention Training for lasting results.
Lots of fun and the chance to get some much-needed emotional refueling!
The annual intensives are almost always the best workshops of the year. If you can join us this year, they will be even better!
This workshop has been approved for Levels 1 through 3 TEAM-CBT Certification
and is suitable for novice as well as highly experienced therapists.
Of course, you’ll get tons of CE credits as well.
The two intensives will be similar, but there are some differences that may be important to you.
Special features at this year’s South SF intensive
Sunny Choi will be speaking on “TEAM with Compassion.” Sunny spoke last year and was amazing, so he is returning, as they say, “by popular demand.” He describes incredible, high-speed TEAM therapy to populations with severe problems and extremely limited resources, including immigrants who do not speak English.
Dr. Jill Levitt will be joining me as co-therapist for the live demonstration on the evening of day 1. In past years, these dramatic live demos have provided tremendous opportunities for learning. If you have never seen Jill, this will be a real treat for you!
I will be joined by many expert helpers from the Feeling Good Institute who will help provide feedback for you during the many practice sessions.
There will be two amazing evening sessions to add depth to your training. You’ll be totally exhausted, but chock-full of incredible new skills and insights that can change the direction of your career and transform your personal life as well.
Special features at this year’s Calgary, Canada intensive
The three optional evening hikes / meals together will be a highlight for many. While hiking, you will have chances for personal work with David, Q and A, difficult case consultation, and additional practice with the new techniques you are learning.
If you don’t want to hike, you can enjoy your evenings with friends or family and refuel for the next day.
There will be a live demo on the morning of day 2. In past years, these live therapy sessions have been inspirational and wonderfully informative. Last year’s live therapy demonstration in Whistler was jaw-dropping!
And, as you probably know, Jack Hirose always puts on an amazing event, designed to provide you with maximum comfort, delight, and learning!
In both workshops, David promises to catapult at least 65% of the participants into a state of joyous enlightenment. Would you like to finally free yourself from feelings of self-doubt and endless obsessions about whether you’re “good enough?” Check out the registration links now!
Feeling good feels wonderful! You owe it to yourself to feel good! Join me in
Rhonda and David interview Garry, a veteran who David treated for PTSD several years ago at a trauma workshop in Michigan. Garry describes how a repressed horrific memory from his childhood suddenly and forcefully re-emerged when he smelled some Queen Anne’s Lace that were in blossom. He suddenly remembered how a school bus he was riding home on hit a horse with a boy, Tommy, who was riding bareback, when the horse suddenly lurched in front of the bus. Tommy was Gary’s classmate.
The bus driver said, “Don’t look!” But Garry watched as his friend, who was trapped under the dead horse, “bled out” and died.
Once this totally forgotten memory re-emerged decades later, roughly 18 months prior to Garry’s session with David, it constantly intruded into Garry’s every interaction for the next year and a half. Garry says,
“I was seeing Tommy all the time, and having symptoms of anxiety, intrusive memory and dissociation experiences. I would often see the image of Tommy lying on the pavement superimposed over conversations I was happened with people in an intimate way. It was quite disturbing and anxiety provoking.”
Garry tearfully describes what he experienced during his TEAM-CBT session with David, including his dissociation at one point during the session, and the profound changes he experienced by the end of the session.
Can severe PTSD be treated in a single therapy session? Did Garry really improve? Were the changes real? Did they last? And how did the therapy work?
You’ll find out when you listen to this amazing and inspiring interview! We are incredibly indebted to Garry for his courage and openness to share this experience with all of you!
You can reach Dr. Burns at david@feelinggood.com. Dr. Rhonda Barovsky practices in Walnut Creek, California, and can be reached at rbarovsky@aol.com.
If you like our jingle music and would like to support the composer Brett Van Donsel, you may download it here.
* * *
There will be three awesome intensives for you this summer and fall!
Many of our podcasts are inspired by listeners like you who send us really cool emails with show ideas. Sometimes the emails are from people wanting self-help with emotional or relationship conflicts. And sometimes, they are from therapists wanting more training and information about TEAM. Rhonda and I love your emails!
Yesterday, I got the following email from Dipti Joshi, one of our listeners and TEAM-CBT therapists from India. Dipti flew all the way from India to Canada with her lovely daughter last summer for my intensive in Whistler, Canada. I am hopeful that Dipti will one day create the first TEAM Treatment and Training Center in India. How cool would that be!
Here’s the email that Dipti sent me:
Dear David,
I am really enjoying all the educational materials available on your website. Thank you! I will soon be taking my Level 3 TEAM certification exam, and am seeking your kind blessings for the same!
Also, I have a special request for you. Is it possible to have a workshop or podcast on “paradoxical techniques?” I feel this is a very challenging area, and that a lot of skill is needed. Perhaps you can also talk about why paradoxical techniques can be so effective.
Meanwhile can you suggest me something to read or listen to for this?
Regards, Dipti
Thanks, Dipit! Today’s podcast will be an introduction to the use of paradox in TEAM therapy, a kind of overview. When my new book, Feeling Great, comes out, I am hoping to do a series of workshops on a variety of powerful paradoxical techniques. And of course, the new book will have a great deal of instruction on paradoxical techniques as well.
These are the four key components of TEAM:
T = Testing
E = Empathy
A = (Paradoxical) Agenda Setting
M = Methods
In today’s podcast, Dr. Rhonda and I will explain why each of these components is inherently paradoxical. For example, when you do the T = Testing, you assess changes in the patient’s symptoms from the start to the end of the session, and the patient rates you on the Empathy and Helpfulness scales as well, When you look at the ratings, you will probably discover that you aren’t helping your patient much, if at all. You may also discover that your perceptions of how the patient feels, and how the patients feels about you, are off-base, and sometimes alarmingly so.
This can be very disturbing, especially if you’re not use to this kind of information. However, in TEAM, we are actually hoping for failure, and welcome that kind of “disturbing” information. Why is this? Isn’t therapy all about recovery and making positive changes? Why in the world would the therapist want to know that he or she is not helping?
It’s because many of the most important breakthroughs in therapy come from the therapist’s discovery that he or she is failing. We WANT to fail! Why?
David illustrates this paradox by describing his discovery that he was not actually helping a patient he thought he’d helped enormously. David explains how and why this shocking information led to a tremendous breakthrough.
When you review how your patient rated you at the end of the session, you may discover that your patient gives you failing grades on the E = Empathy scale. The patient’s ratings may indicate that he or she didn’t experience you as sufficiently warm and caring, or completely trustworthy, and that you didn’t really “get” how she or he was feeling inside.
Once again, as TEAM therapists we welcome failing grades on the Empathy Scale. Why? It’s because your worst therapeutic failure will nearly always be your greatest success in disguise.
How can this be? It seems absurd, or impossible. Karl Rogers told us that empathy is the necessary and sufficient condition for personality change. So why would a TEAM therapist hope to discover that he or she is failing in this category?
You’ll discover the explanation for this paradox on today’s podcast.
When the patient asks for help during the A = Agenda Setting phase of the session, the TEAM therapist doesn’t jump in and offer to help, using this or that therapy method. In fact, the TEAM therapist will often assume the role of the patient subconscious resistance and argue for the status quo, sincerely encouraging the patient to cling to the feelings of depression, anxiety, shame, worthlessness, hopelessness, and anger. The therapist will bring out all the reasons why the patient should RESIST change.
Why in the world would a therapist want to do that? It sounds crazy! You’ll find out on this podcast.
And finally, during the M = Methods phase of the session, the TEAM therapist will be working with the patient on his or her negative thoughts, like, “I’m worthless,” or “I’m not as good as I should be,” or “I’m hopelessly damaged because of the abuse I experienced as a child.” And the TEAM therapist’s goal is not success, but rather failing as fast as you can, trying technique after technique that DOESN’T work and the patient’s belief in the Negative Thought is still 100%.
Why would a therapist want to fail over and over? Isn’t that the opposite of what a skillful, compassionate, and effective therapist would want to do?
Listen to this podcast and you’ll discover the answer to these questions. You’ll also see that the patient, not the therapist, is the expert in TEAM, and discover how the patient, and not the therapist, guides all the changing.
David and Rhonda talk about the important difference between healthy and unhealthy use of paradoxical ideas and techniques in therapy, and describe how narcissistic therapists may use paradoxical techniques in an effort to manipulate “resistant” or annoying patients. This dysfunctional use of paradox is unfortunately common, and will rarely or never be effective.
David and Rhonda
You can reach Dr. Burns at david@feelinggood.com. Dr. Rhonda Barovsky practices in Walnut Creek, California, and can be reached at rbarovsky@aol.com.
If you like our jingle music and would like to support the composer Brett Van Donsel, you may download it here.
* * *
There will be three awesome intensives for you this summer and fall!
If you have ever dreamed of bringing extremely rapid healing to your patients, this is a workshop you won’t want to miss. David Burns, MD, will present TEAM-CBT: a new, powerful treatment approach that can produce rapid and lasting changes in mild or severe depression and anxiety. Lectures, videos and live demonstrations by a master therapist will be followed by opportunities to practice the techniques with your colleagues.
These exercises will leave you with a deeper, richer appreciation of the practice of psychotherapy as well as a variety of innovative new tools you’ll be able to apply right away in your clinical work. In addition, you’ll have the opportunity to do your own personal work during the workshop so you can experience greater self-esteem and joy in your professional work and in your personal life as well.
High-Speed Treatment of Depression and Anxiety Disorders
There will also be a four-day intensive in Calgary, and it’s coming up SOON, so act fast if you’d like to register. The Calgary intensive will be similar to the SF and Atlanta intensives, but there will be no evening sessions. Instead, Dr. Burns will lead informal evening hikes for those who are interested, followed by dinner. On the hikes, you can do personal work, ask questions, practice techniques, or just schmooze with colleagues and have fun!
Or, you can just relax and unwind every evening, and absorb all the wonderful new ideas and methods you’re learning!
Last week we published the first half of the session with Rhonda, who was struggling with severe performance anxiety about her work as the new host of the Feeling Good Podcast host. We did the initial T = Testing, which indicated many intense negative feelings, as well as E = Empathy phase of TEAM therapy session.
This week, we include the conclusion of the session, with A = Paradoxical Agenda Setting and M = Methods, plus final T = Testing to see how effective, or ineffective the session was.
As a reminder of the work we did on the last podcast, you can review Rhonda’s Daily Mood Log here.
When you listen, you will see that the changes Rhonda experienced were amazing. But were these changes real? It almost seem too easy, and too fast, especially for a problem that started in childhood and persisted right up to the present moment. Was the session just a publicity stunt, perhaps, or some kind of superficial quick fix? David asks Rhonda about this, as well as this question: ‘If the changes were real, what caused such rapid and profound changes?
David and Rhonda used many TEAM-CBT techniques they during the session, including these:
David Empathized with the Five Secrets of Effective Communication at the start of the session during the E = Empathy phase. Of course, good empathy is necessary throughout a therapy session.
David melted away Rhonda’s resistance during the A = Paradoxical Agenda Setting. These techniques included:
Straightforward Invitation
Miracle Cure Question
Magic Button
Positive Reframing
Pivot Question
Magic Dial
The M = Methods that were helpful in this session included:
The Individual Downward Arrow to identify the Self-Defeating Beliefs that triggered Rhonda’s feelings of inadequacy.Rhonda enjoyed this exercise and felt it was on target. We identified many Self-Defeating Beliefs, including:
Perfectionism
Perceived Perfectionism
Achievement Addiction
Approval Addiction
Love Addiction
Fear of Rejection
Submissiveness
Inadequacy schema
Spotlight Fantasy
Brushfire Fallacy
Superwoman
The Interpersonal Downward Arrow to illuminate how Rhonda saw her relationship with her father, with David, and with some other people, including the podcast listeners. This is kind of like Psychoanalysis at warp speed. Rhonda said this felt uncomfortable, perhaps because it cast David somewhat as a dangerous ogre!
David and Rhonda smashed several of Rhonda’s Self-Defeating Beliefs with the Feared Fantasy Technique
Identify the Distortions
Paradoxical Double Standard Technique
Externalization of Voices
Acceptance Paradox / Self-Defense Paradigm
Self-Disclosure / Exposure
The Experimental Technique
Thinking in Shades of Gray
Finally, if the changes were real, will they last? Or will Rhonda just slip back into more performance anxiety and self-doubt?
You can click on this link if you’d like to review the evolution of Rhonda’s Daily Mood Log during the session. Please notice that the link is several pages long.
I want to thank Rhonda, my esteemed colleague, friend, and wonderful podcast host, for giving all of us this incredible gift of her humanness.
And I, Rhonda, want to thank the most marvelous, compassionate and incredible David Burns, for the gift of healing and facilitating me experiencing enlightenment and peace from these difficult feelings and negative thoughts that were devastating me. I feel so much gratitude for all of our work together, for your trusting me enough to invite me to be the host of these podcasts, and for the gift of your friendship. Words can’t express the full depth of my love for you and for everything you have given me both personally and professionally!
Did you like the personal work we did? Was it helpful for you personally? Rhonda took a chance and was courageous to share this intensely personal experience with you. Let us know if you liked the podcast!
If you are a therapist, or an interested patient, let us know if this was it a good learning experience. Would you like to hear more podcasts with live personal work?
We are here to serve you, so share your thoughts and feelings with us, as well as your wish list for future podcasts!
David and Rhonda
You can reach Dr. Burns at david@feelinggood.com. Dr. Rhonda Barovsky practices in Walnut Creek, California, and can be reached at rbarovsky@aol.com.
If you like our jingle music and would like to support the composer Brett Van Donsel, you may download it here.
* * *
There will be three awesome intensives
for you this summer and fall!
Observe live demonstrations of TEAM-CBT with audience volunteers that are cool, powerful and inspirational.
Have FUN—lots of neat people to hang out with!
Earn TEAM certification credits as well as CE credits.
Learn tons of powerful new techniques to boost your effectiveness in the treatment of depression, anxiety disorders, and habits and addictions.
Practice in small groups, with immediate feedback to help you refine and master your new skills.
Learn to pinpoint the eight most common forms of therapeutic resistance.
Learn how to melt away therapeutic resistance for super-fast recoveries.
Overcome your own feelings of anxiety and self-doubt, and leave the workshop in a state of joyous enlightenment! You can’t beat that!
Lots of tears—and lots of laughter!
You’ll work your butt off—but come out with exciting new insights and directions for your clinical work.
Special features at this year’s South SF intensive
Sunny Choi will be speaking on “TEAM with Compassion.” Sunny spoke last year and was amazing, so he is returning, as they say, “by popular demand.”
Jill Levitt will be joining David as co-therapist for the live demonstration on the evening of day 1. In past years, these dramatic live demos have provided tremendous opportunities for learning.
Do your own “solo flight” on the evening of day 3. In previous years, this has been the highlight of the annual SF intensive.
I will be joined by many expert helpers from the Feeling Good Institute who will provide feedback and mentoring for you during the many practice sessions. Of course, I’ll be giving you personal feedback, too!
Special features at this year’s Calgary, Canada intensive
The three optional evening hikes / meals together will be a highlight for many. While hiking, you will have chances for personal work with David, Q and A, and additional practice with the many new techniques you are learning.
There will be a live demo on the morning of day 2.
The summer / fall intensives are almost always my best teaching of the year. If you attend, this year’s intensives will be even better!
The Calgary Intensive will be from July 15 to 18, 2019.
For more information / registration, click here!
The South SF Intensive will be from July 29 to August 1, 2019.
For more information / registration, click here!
The new Atlanta intensive will be from November 4 – 7, 2019,
and will be similar to the South SF Intensive. This will be my first east coast intensive in 25 years! For more information / registration, click here!
David Burns, MD
Unsolicited Testimonials from Participants at David’s Workshops
These are anonymous comments on workshop evaluation forms:
The live demonstration in the evening was freaking incredible!!!
The live demonstration was dynamite! . . . It was beautiful!!
The entire process was fantastic!
I liked all of it! I appreciated Dr. Burns willingness to be vulnerable with his own flaws and fears.
Here’s a photo of my esteemed colleague, Mike Christensen, at a recent Canadian workshop. We’ll be working together again this year in Calgary!
Here’s a photo from some of my Sunday hikes in California with therapists from my free weekly training group at Stanford.
Have you ever struggled with performance anxiety, thinking you might fail or not be good enough? I think it is fair to say that every therapist in my Tuesday training group at Stanford has struggled with fairly intense feelings of anxiety and self-doubt, and perhaps you have, too, thinking you should be smarter or better than you are, and fearing that others would judge you if they saw your “true self.” In fact, I would suspect that most of our podcast fans have struggled with these feelings at some time during your life, and maybe even recently or now.
Well, today, we’ve got a wonderful program in store for you. Our own Dr. Rhonda Barovsky asked me for personal help with her own anxieties about being the new podcast host. I asked if she wanted to do it live, on a podcast, and she generously agreed!
In this heart-warming and very human session, Rhonda shares the negative thoughts and feelings she had when she listened to herself on several podcasts and begin noticing this or that error she made. She felt intensely down, anxious, ashamed, inadequate, rejected, embarrassed, discouraged, frustrated, and angry, to name just a few of her negative feelings, and her mind was flooded with negative thoughts like these:
I sound stupid and inarticulate, and some of my comments were inaccurate, like when I said psychiatric diagnoses are meaningless labels.
I’ve had feelings of insecurity ever since I was a child, and should be over this by now!
David is going to regret having me as the podcast host!
Everyone will know I’m a fraud, and no one will like or respect me.
People will judge and reject me, and I’ll end up ostracized and alone.
She believed these thoughts at 100%. You might recall that the Necessary and Sufficient Conditions for emotional distress are:
This is because there are two goals in TEAM-CBT. The first goal is to crush the negative thoughts in the here and now, so that you’ll feel relief. The second goal is to modify the Self-Defeating Beliefs so you’ll be less prone to similar thoughts and feelings in the future.
In next week’s podcast, you will hear the second half of the session, which included A = (Paradoxical) Agenda Setting and M = Methods. You’ll also hear the final T = Testing to find out how effective the session was, and how Rhonda rated David on Empathy and Helpfulness.
I think you’ll find that both sessions are incredibly inspiring and wonderful sources of learning as well. I want to give a shout out to Rhonda for being so courageous and vulnerable and real, and for making this live therapy session possible! After you’ve heard Part 2 next week, let us know what you think!
You’ve all responded very positively to the live therapy we’ve done on the Feeling Good Podcasts, and you’ve asked for more. Rhonda and I are committed to making that happen for you, and we are both so grateful for your support, which means a lot to both of us. Thank you!
David and Rhonda
You can reach Dr. Burns at david@feelinggood.com. Dr. Rhonda Barovsky practices in Walnut Creek, California, and can be reached at rbarovsky@aol.com.
If you like our jingle music and would like to support the composer Brett Van Donsel, you may download it here.
* * *
There will be three awesome intensives
for you this summer and fall!
In the Spring of 2017, we published our first live TEAM therapy session so our listeners could peak behind closed doors to see an actual TEAM therapy session. Although the session lasted about two hours, we broke it up into seven consecutive podcasts including expert commentary on each segment of the session.
At the start of the session, Mark confessed that although he’d achieved his first goal, he’d failed to achieve his second goal because he wasn’t able to get close to his sons, especially his oldest son. At the start of the session he rated his relationship with his son on the Relationship Satisfaction Scale as only 2 out of 30, an extraordinarily low score. In addition, his scores on the Daily Mood Log indicated he felt very sad, unhappy, guilty, and ashamed. He also felt very inadequate, lonely, self-conscious, discouraged and defeated, frustrated, and somewhat resentful and upset, too. He confessed that he’d felt this way for years.
By the end of the session, these feelings had largely disappeared, and Mark was in a state of joy. In fact, we all felt elated—but will it last?
Many people complain that the rapid and dramatic change I experienced when I do TEAM therapy cannot be real, and cannot last, and that it has to be superficial or fake. They insist that real change can only unfold slowly, over years, or even after a decade or more of talk therapy. I respect critical thinking, and if you’d told me that such rapid and dramatic changes were possible ten years ago, before TEAM had emerged with all the new technology, I would have thought you were a con artist too!
Of course, others have argued the other side of the coin, pointing out that TEAM is research-based and genuinely appears to represent a significant, or even amazing breakthrough in psychotherapy for depression and anxiety, and that the changes ARE real. They have also argued that rapid change should be the goal of treatment, rather than just nursing people along for prolonged periods of time without tangible and measurable changes.
Rhonda and I had the wonderful opportunity of sitting down to interview Mark this last Sunday, following one of my Sunday hikes, so we could try to get some answers to these questions. We asked Mark whether he now felt that the changes were real, and how he’d been doing in the two years since the session. Did the changes last?
The interview with Mark was pretty mind-blowing. He confessed that at the start of the session he, too, was very skeptical that years and years of negative feelings could be reversed in a single therapy session. Then he summarized the session he’d had with Dr. Levitt and me in May of 2017, and his tears flowed once again, as he recalled his feelings of failure at being unable to connect with his sons.
Rhonda asked Mark what happened after the session. Did he just relapse back into the same way he’d been feeling?
Mark said that right after his session, there was an amazing and almost instantaneous transformation of his relationships with all of his sons. He used the Five Secrets of Effective Communication for the first time in his interactions with his sons, and they opened up immediately. He has felt extremely happy, over joyed, really, and reported that:
The changes were VERY real!
The changes DID last.
His relationships with his children and grandchildren are now fantastic.
Rhonda and I are incredibly indebted to Mark for giving us such a transformative and inspiring interview! It probably won’t quiet all of the critics, but this information may be illuminating and inspiring for those who are intrigued by the many new developments in TEAM-CBT.
And my message to those who are still critical of TEAM, or critical of me—please continue to use your critical thinking and skepticism when you evaluate TEAM or any other approach. It was my own skepticism about the things I learned during my residency training and clinical work that actually led to the emergence of TEAM therapy. I don’t want to quiet my critics, I want to praise all of you!
David and Rhonda
Coming Up Soon
Follow-Up with Gary: Rhonda and David interview Gary, a veteran who David treated for PTSD several years ago at a trauma workshop. Gary describes how a repressed horrific memory from his childhood suddenly and forcefully re-emerged when he smelled some Queen Anne’s Lace that were in blossom, and what he experienced during his TEAM-CBT session with David.
Can severe PTSD be treated in a single therapy session? You’ll find out when you listen to this amazing and emotional interview with Gary!
You can reach Dr. Burns at david@feelinggood.com. Dr. Rhonda Barovsky practices in Walnut Creek, California, and can be reached at rbarovsky@aol.com.
If you like our jingle music and would like to support the composer Brett Van Donsel, you may download it here.
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Would you like to learn how to do TEAM-CBT?
There will be three awesome intensives
for you this summer and fall!
Every day I receive wonderful emails from individuals like you who have heard the Feeling Good Podcasts or read my books or blogs. I just got this amazing email from a fellow named Pete after he listened to the latest podcast on Bibliotherapy. He kindly gave me permission to share it with all of you!
Dear Doctor Burns,
Your book, Feeling Good, has changed my life. After stagnating for two and a half years in three different types of therapy and getting more depressed, I was shown ‘Feeling Good‘ by a social worker. I read on the page exactly what I was doing that created my anger and depression.
I also learnt what perfectionism really was and its negative effects. So I thought… “If I’m doing this to myself, (through my thinking) I’m going to stop doing it.”
That very moment saw the end of my depression, anger and general unhappiness. By removing my cognitive distortions, it was liberating to discover that I was not at the mercy of other people’s behavior. It wasn’t what other people were doing that was affecting me but rather it was my own thoughts!
I feel that I can cope with anything now. I also have recommended this book to many people so David gets the big bucks! A big thanks to David for all his hard work.
Pete
What Pete “discovered” is not new–Epictetus said the same thing nearly 2,000 years ago, and it is very basic–but it is SO basic that it’s hard to “get” at first. When you suddenly comprehend this notion, that we are all creating our own emotional reality at every moment of every day, you can experience enlightenment. It’s not just feeling a bit less depressed, but a transforming and remarkable experience that’s available to all of us!
One small warning. The Buddha said that we all drift in and out of enlightenment. This means that the negative distorted thoughts WILL return, for all of us! That’s why Relapse Prevention Training is so important.
To learn more about any topic, you can use the search function in the right-hand panel of every page on my website. You’ll really like it!
David Burns, MD
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Would you like to learn more about TEAM-CBT?
Check Out these Four Cool Upcoming Workshops for You!
The first is coming up SOON!
ACT FAST if you want to reserve a seat.
TEAM-CBT Methods for Anxiety Disorders:
Step-by-Step Training for Therapists
David Burns, MD and Jill Levitt, PhD
When? Sunday May 19th, 2019
8:30 am-4:30 pm PST (11:30 am-7:30 pm EST)
Live Online One Day Workshop
$135, 7 CE hours available
Therapists at all levels are welcome.
Learn new skills to reduce resistance and boost patient’s motivation to change. Practice powerful, practical TEAM-CBT techniques to help your patients overcome every form of anxiety rapidly.
Lively, amusing, and immensely useful day of online training
Online support and dynamic small group training
David and Jill will use a combination of didactic teaching, live demonstrations, and breakout group practice with emphasis on skill building.
Workshop will stream live and is easily accessible from anywhere on any device with WiFi. To join, just click on the link provided before the workshop.
Completion of this workshop counts towards TEAM-CBT Level 1, 2 or 3 Certification
Awesome brief videos
Learn how to treat GAD, OCD, Panic Attacks, Social Anxiety, Phobias, PTSD, and more
We Are Sold Out in Person–
But Online Slots are Still Available
Don’t miss out on learning from David and Jill, the “dynamic duo”–
