Last week you heard Part 1 of David’s TEAM Therapy session with Neil Sattin, who became pretty despondent and discouraged right after the first shut down because of the covid-19 pandemic in March of 2020. David and Neil went through the T = Testing and E = Empathy parts of TEAM, and David helped Neil develop a Daily Mood Log so he could record his negative thoughts and feelings at one specific moment at the end of a day when he was feeling like he hadn’t gotten enough work done. Perhaps you’ve had the same problem at times!
Today you’ll hear the A = Assessment of Resistance and M = Methods parts of the session. As they begin, David asks Neil the Magic Button and Miracle Cure questions, and Neil says that he definitely does want help and would push the Magic Button to make all of his negative thoughts and feelings on his Daily Mood Log disappear.
David cautions against that and suggests Positive Reframing, asking two questions about each negative thought and feeling.
- What does this thought or feeling show about you that’s positive and awesome?
- What are some potential benefits, or advantages, of this thought or feeling?
Here’s Neil’s list of Positives:
My sadness:
- Shows that I’m ambitious
- Motivates me to achieve a lot
- Shows that I have high standards
My anxiety:
- Shows that I’m responsible
- Keeps me vigilant
- Fuels me to take action
- Reminds me that I’m doing important things
My guilt:
- Shows that I have a moral compass
My feelings of defectiveness and inadequacy:
- Show that I want to be a good role model
- Show that I’m willing to be honest about my flaws
- Show that I hold myself accountable
- Show that I’m humble
My feelings of being alone show that:
- I value connections with others
- Allow me to feel close to people
My feelings of embarrassment and humiliation show that:
- I have high standards and goals
- I want my life to mean something
- I value acceptance
My discouragement shows that:
- I have a vision
- I’m realistic about the many challenges I face and the sheer volume of work I have to do
- I’m willing to face the truth
My frustration shows that:
- I’ll persevere.
- I won’t stop and give up.
Feeling annoyed and irritated:
- Shows that I won’t tolerate things that get in my way
- Gives me energy and determination
Feeling overwhelmed:
- Reminds me that I might be taking on too much
- Protects me from trying and failing
- Shows that I’m looking for ways to take care of myself.
After listing these positives, Neil used the Magic Dial and indicated that he’d like to dial down his negative feelings to lower levels, rather than getting rid of them entirely, as you can see in the “% Goal” column of his Daily Mood Log.
Then they moved on to M = Methods, focusing first on Neil’s Negative Thought (NT):
“I’m not capable of getting organized. After identifying a number of distortions in the thought, Neil was able to generate a positive thought that fulfilled the necessary and sufficient conditions for emotional change:
- The Positive Thought (PT) has to be 100% true.
- The PT has to drastically lower your belief in the Negative Thought.
You can see this on his DML. David and Neil used a variety of techniques, including Externalization of Voices, to challenge the rest of his NTs. Neil re-rated his negative feelings at the end of the session. They all feel to zero except feeling alone, which went from 80 to 5, which was his goal.
Rhonda and David
You can reach Dr. Burns at david@feelinggood.com. Dr. Rhonda Barovsky practices in Walnut Creek, California, and can be reached at rbarovsky@aol.com. She is a Level 4 Certified TEAM-CBT therapist and trainer and specializes in the treatment of trauma, anxiety, depression, and relationship problems. She also does forensic work in family court, but finds TEAM-CBT to be way more rewarding!
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This is the cover of my new book, Feeling Great. It is available now on Amazon!
Hi Dr Burns:
Thank you for this great podcast.
I was particularly impressed by and related to the idea of “Beating Up On Yourself”. I think it is so easy to fall into that trap.
My question is, that I don’t see how the positive reframing aspect of TEAM actually contributes to the therapy.
Once you did the reframing with Neil, you didn’t seem to go back to it. So why is that a necessity thing to do.
I understand that the positive side of negative thoughts could cause resistance to give up the negative thoughts, but that didn’t seem to be dealt with.
Thank you so much for these podcasts and I have just started to read “Feeling Great”.
Maybe you go into the positive reframing aspects and benefits more in the new book.
Thanks, Harvey. the session was a while back, but by memory my thinking was that the Positive Reframing was not a particularly powerful tool for Neil, and I think he thought that also. It is not the case that any one tool–and I have created / learned more than 100 methods–will be effective for everyone. That’s why it’s so great to have a huge palette of tools and techniques, so you can find the path forward for many patients, and not just a few! Some people think that if a technique is not helpful for one patient, then it is no good. Some people think that one technique, like meditation, or exercise, or medication, should be “the answer” for everyone. My experience is radically different, and it is hard for me to even comprehend how people can get sucked into some of these notions–but they do! david
In general then, can you tell me what is the benefit of positive reframing and how does that then fit into thinking and feeling better?
Thanks so much for your quick response.
There are tons of examples in the live work on the podcasts. Tell me which specific session you are thinking about? There’s a dramatic example in the session with Sarah, for example, and Marilyn, and Mark, and on and on. I’m kind of unclear on your question. Neil got a dramatic mood lift, but more through methods like Ext of Voices. It sounds like you are saying, and I know this could not be true, that since it wasn’t especially helpful to him, it is not going to be mind-blowing to others? Help! I’m confused. d
Will make this an Ask David and use your first name, will that work? In the meantime, I might be able to find a list that addresses this, but heavily slammed for time just now due to book relase. Here is one hint–the shame disappears or diminishes when you see your depression and anxiety are not due to what’s wrong with you, like a “chemical imbalance in your brain,” or a “mental disorder,” but what’s right with you. d
Sorry for any confusion. And I will check out those other podcasts you cited.
But my question was, once you establish the positive benefits of your negative thoughts, how is the recognizing of those benefits used to help you feel better.
It almost seems counter intuitive, since knowing the benefits of your negative thinking might in fact increase your desire to keep the negative thoughts.
I hope that is a bit clearer.
Thank you for your response.
Thank you so much.
Meanwhile, I am reading and learning from your great new book.
Thanks, the question may be addressed there, too, but it is a bit of a paradox! d
About the new book. On Kindle page 108, you ask the reader to list the distortion for Karen’s thought “I never should have let her go out and play.” But on p.109, you begin your list for the statement “I’m a bad mom.” You explicitly say your doing that on Kindle page 110.
Little thing, it is a Great book.
Good catch, thanks! And thanks for kind comments! david