I apologize for two bloopers today. First, the Feeling Good Podcasts was published later than usual, and we forgot to include the podcast itself! I have now fixed it, so to get the text, links AND the session with our wonderful patient, Mark, CLICK HERE!
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PS here is a pic from yesterday’s Sunday hike. More on that later.
Hi Dr Burns, I’ve been listening to the podcast since it’s first days and getting a lot out of it. The session with Mark where you go through paradoxical agenda setting was eye opening. I’ve experienced in my adult life depression, anxiety, anger, feelings of inadequacy and I still struggle to this day. I wanted to say to Mark that I think there’s one more positive thing that his negative thoughts say about him – that he’s brave. To be so open and to be willing to face your failures and take responsibility takes courage. Is there any way that a TEAM-CBT therapist would be willing to work over Skype for international patients? Thank you and also thanks to Fabrice and Jill, and with much appreciation for your work and for the podcast.
Keren, Thank you for your comment. Via email, I have sent you the contact information for two TEAM-CBT therapists who work via Skype.
Your comment that Mark is brave is very kind and very true. However, this is the biggest error therapists make when trying to learn Paradoxical Agenda Setting–namely, giving general compliments that are not actually implied in any of the patients negative thoughts and feelings. This type of effort to cheer someone up often–in fact–usually backfires, and irritates the patient. Sadly, this type of comment can come across as patronizing, and it rarely makes the patient feel better. I am glad you made your comment, and hope that my input is welcomed. We learn through “joyous failures” in TEAM-CBT.
Just to make this clear, look at any of Mark’s negative thoughts or feelings, such as sad and unhappy. Do these feelings show he is brave? Not really! Or take his thought, “I’ve been a failure as a father.” This could arguably show he is courageous to face his failures, rather than to deny them. So in that sensse he is very brave. But you said he was brave to share his inner feelings so openly on the podcast. While that is true, it is a far far reach from any of his negative thoughts and feelings.
TEAM-CBT is somewhat subtle and challenging to learn. I make it look easy, but it takes a lot of work and trial and error, and commitment to master.
Thanks again! And please keep participating!