Video Problems with the David and Jill Show Explained :(

Video Problems with the David and Jill Show Explained :(

Dear colleague,

Jill and I were SO excited to do our David and Jill Show yesterday, Sunday, at 3 PM. Sadly, the BeLive TV software simply DID NOT WORK. We started really early, well ahead of the scheduled show time, but I could not bring Jill into the broadcast studio. We were really angry, panicky and disappointed for all of you. I apologize deeply. Sadly, I had to delete the video.

I was so ticked off last night I did not get a whole lot of sleep! Jill and Lisa Kelley also felt the situation pretty intensely.

We will have to reevaluate whether or not we are going to be able to use that software in the future, as the problems have gotten much worse of late. We got a help person live, but she could not figure it out, either. Yikes!

However, DO NOT DESPAIR. We will bring you this topic yet, but may do it as a Feeling Good Podcast, as our recording and publishing system is far more more reliable.

So stay tuned for our show on–

Can the Five Secrets of Effective Communication Help Us in this Era of Intensely Polarized Politics?

I’ll let you know once it’s recorded and scheduled. 🙂

Jill, Lisa and I deeply appreciate your interest and support over the past year or more, and we really want to do stellar work for you.

David

* * *

TWO COOL UPCOMING WORKSHOPS FOR YOU

Dr. Jill Levitt and I are offering what I think will be an outstanding workshop on the treatment of unwanted habits and addictions on Sunday, February 10. Our Sunday workshops are tremendously fun, so consider attending if you are interested.  We quickly sold out in-person but you can still join online.

THERE WILL BE MANY EXPERTS TRAINERS TO GUIDE THE ONLINE GROUP IN THE SMALL GROUP EXERCISES

During the program, you will have the chance to work on one of your own habits / addictions  so you will get the double benefit of learning cool new treatment techniques and doing some personal healing at the same time!

You will develop a deeper understanding of Outcome and Process Resistance, and you will learn how to deal with this twin-horned Devil. As you know, TEAM-CBT features many innovative techniques to reduce Outcome and Process Resistance.

Here’s the BAD news. Very few therapists have the skills, insights, or mind-set to deal with resistance, and this is the main cause of therapeutic failure in the treatment of depression, anxiety disorders, relationship problems, and habits and addictions.

Here’s the GOOD news. Once you acquire these skills, your clinical effectiveness will soar!

Here are the specifics–

Coming Soon!

Act fast if you want to attend!

Don’t miss out learning from David Burns, MD, one of the great pioneers of Cognitive Therapy, and from the fabulous, Jill Levitt, PhD, Director of Training at the Feeling Good Institute in Mt. View, CA!

TEAM-CBT Methods for Unwanted Habits and Addictions: Step-by-Step Training for Therapists

WHEN: February 10th, 2019, 8:30 am – 4:30 pm PST
(11:30 am-7:30 pm EST)

WHERE: Join us live online or in person at the Creekside Inn, Palo Alto, CA.

HOW MUCH DOES IT COST? $135,

WILL I GET CE CREDITS? YES!
7 CE hours available

WILL I GET CREDIT IN THE TEAM LICENSURE PROGRAM? YES!
Completion of this workshop also counts towards TEAM-CBT Level 1, 2 or 3 Certification

WHO CAN ATTEND? Therapists of all levels are welcome

CAN I REGISTER IF I’M NOT A THERAPIST? In my opinion (Dr. Burns), although the workshop is geared for therapists, it will be taught in a clear and basic way that anyone can benefit from. Please check with the Feeling Good Institute if you want to attend.

CAN I WORK ON MY OWN HABIT / ADDICTION? Absolutely!
Heal yourself, heal your clients!

WILL I HAVE FUN? Yes!

You will also:

  • Learn new skills to reduce resistance and boost the motivation to change. This is THE key to the treatment of any habit or addiction.
  • Learn how to use Dr. Burns’ powerful Decision-Making Tool and Triple Paradox Technique.
  • Practice and master the Devil’s Advocate Technique to help you and your patients overcome difficult-to-stop habits and addictions to drugs, alcohol, overeating, procrastination, and more.

You will love this lively, amusing, and immensely useful day of training with Drs. Burns, Levitt and the Feeling Good Institute Staff. The trainers will use a combination of didactic teaching, live demonstrations, and breakout group practice to enhance skill-building.

This wonderful workshop will stream live and is easily accessible from anywhere in the world on any device with WiFi. To join, just click on the link provided before the workshop.

REGISTER / LEARN MORE

* * *

If you can’t join us for the addictions workshop, consider this cool program on the treatment of anxiety disorders in the spring. But register soon if you want to attend in person, as the in person slots are limited.

TEAM-CBT Methods for Anxiety Disorders–

Step-by-Step Training for Therapists

by David D. Burns, MD and Jill Levitt, PhD

May 19, 2019

You can attend in person or from home via Live Streaming

Stay tuned for more details or check it out now!

Jill and david 2

Friendly Reminder–the David and Jill Show Returns this Sunday, January 13, 2019!

Friendly Reminder–the David and Jill Show Returns this Sunday, January 13, 2019!

Can the Five Secrets of Effective Communication Help Us in this Era of Intensely Polarized Politics?

After a hiatus for the holidays, the Sunday FB Live David and Jill Show will return with an exciting and controversial topic. How can we communicate more effectively with friends, family and loved ones who are on the opposite side of the political divide?

Clearly, our nation is split into intensely polarized political factions, and we can all feel the frustration. Passions on both sides of the divide are strong and often filled with hostility and mistrust. Communicate with colleagues, friends and loved ones with radically different political beliefs can be challenging, to say the least.

Jill and I  will respond to a podcast fan who kindly allowed us to share her intensely painful conflict with her mother on the show. One is an ardent Trump fan, and the other is an equally passionate anti-Trumper, and they are both shedding plenty of tears and struggling with feelings of intense anger and exasperation!

Can you identify with similar conflicts in your own family or circle of friends? I know that I can, and it can be extremely painful and disturbing.

Is there any hope? What can we do? Tune in this Sunday and find out!

Jill and I will give you our take on how to communicate more effectively with friends and loved ones in the next David and Jill Show! We will also highlight common errors that our podcast fan is making–and these are errors that you are likely to make, too!

Watch FB Live on Sunday, January 13, 2019,
at 3 PM (PT) for an hour with David and Jill!

If you join us live you can ask questions and make comments. However, you can also watch anytime later on since the show will be recorded and available indefinitely on my public FB Page.

Dr. Levitt is Director of Clinical Training at the Feeling Good institute in Mt. View, California. She is a co-director of my (totally free) weekly psychotherapy training group at Stanford, and is absolutely superb. When we work together, the chemistry can be pure magic. Contact us if you live in the Bay Area and would like to join our weekly group!

Jill and david 2

* * *

TWO COOL UPCOMING WORKSHOPS FOR YOU

Dr. Jill Levitt and I are offering what I think will be an outstanding workshop on the treatment of unwanted habits and addictions on Sunday, February 10. Our Sunday workshops are tremendously fun, so consider attending if you are interested.  We quickly sold out in-person but you can still join online.

THERE WILL BE MANY EXPERTS TRAINERS TO GUIDE THE ONLINE GROUP IN THE SMALL GROUP EXERCISES

During the program, you will have the chance to work on one of your own habits / addictions  so you will get the double benefit of learning cool new treatment techniques and doing some personal healing at the same time!

You will develop a deeper understanding of Outcome and Process Resistance, and you will learn how to deal with this twin-horned Devil. As you know, TEAM-CBT features many innovative techniques to reduce Outcome and Process Resistance.

Here’s the BAD news. Very few therapists have the skills, insights, or mind-set to deal with resistance, and this is the main cause of therapeutic failure in the treatment of depression, anxiety disorders, relationship problems, and habits and addictions.

Here’s the GOOD news. Once you acquire these skills, your clinical effectiveness will soar!

Here are the specifics–

Coming Soon!

Act fast if you want to attend!

Don’t miss out learning from David Burns, MD, one of the great pioneers of Cognitive Therapy, and from the fabulous, Jill Levitt, PhD, Director of Training at the Feeling Good Institute in Mt. View, CA!

TEAM-CBT Methods for Unwanted Habits and Addictions: Step-by-Step Training for Therapists

WHEN: February 10th, 2019, 8:30 am – 4:30 pm PST
(11:30 am-7:30 pm EST)

WHERE: Join us live online or in person at the Creekside Inn, Palo Alto, CA.

HOW MUCH DOES IT COST? $135,

WILL I GET CE CREDITS? YES!
7 CE hours available

WILL I GET CREDIT IN THE TEAM LICENSURE PROGRAM? YES!
Completion of this workshop also counts towards TEAM-CBT Level 1, 2 or 3 Certification

WHO CAN ATTEND? Therapists of all levels are welcome

CAN I REGISTER IF I’M NOT A THERAPIST? In my opinion (Dr. Burns), although the workshop is geared for therapists, it will be taught in a clear and basic way that anyone can benefit from. Please check with the Feeling Good Institute if you want to attend.

CAN I WORK ON MY OWN HABIT / ADDICTION? Absolutely!
Heal yourself, heal your clients!

WILL I HAVE FUN? Yes!

You will also:

  • Learn new skills to reduce resistance and boost the motivation to change. This is THE key to the treatment of any habit or addiction.
  • Learn how to use Dr. Burns’ powerful Decision-Making Tool and Triple Paradox Technique.
  • Practice and master the Devil’s Advocate Technique to help you and your patients overcome difficult-to-stop habits and addictions to drugs, alcohol, overeating, procrastination, and more.

You will love this lively, amusing, and immensely useful day of training with Drs. Burns, Levitt and the Feeling Good Institute Staff. The trainers will use a combination of didactic teaching, live demonstrations, and breakout group practice to enhance skill-building.

This wonderful workshop will stream live and is easily accessible from anywhere in the world on any device with WiFi. To join, just click on the link provided before the workshop.

REGISTER / LEARN MORE

* * *

If you can’t join us for the addictions workshop, consider this cool program on the treatment of anxiety disorders in the spring. But register soon if you want to attend in person, as the in person slots are limited.

TEAM-CBT Methods for Anxiety Disorders–

Step-by-Step Training for Therapists

by David D. Burns, MD and Jill Levitt, PhD

May 19, 2019

You can attend in person or from home via Live Streaming

Stay tuned for more details or check it out now!

The (Totally Free) David and Jill Show Returns this Sunday, January 13, 2019!

The (Totally Free) David and Jill Show Returns this Sunday, January 13, 2019!

Can the Five Secrets of Effective Communication Help Us in this Era of Intensely Polarized Politics?

After a hiatus for the holidays, the Sunday FB Live David and Jill Show will return with an exciting and controversial topic. How can we communicate more effectively with friends, family and loved ones who are on the opposite side of the political divide?

Clearly, our nation is split into intensely polarized political factions, and we can all feel the frustration. Passions on both sides of the divide are strong and often filled with hostility and mistrust. Communicate with colleagues, friends and loved ones with radically different political beliefs can be challenging, to say the least.

Jill and I  will respond to a podcast fan who kindly allowed us to share her intensely painful conflict with her mother on the show. One is an ardent Trump fan, and the other is an equally passionate anti-Trumper, and they are both shedding plenty of tears and struggling with feelings of intense anger and exasperation!

Can you identify with similar conflicts in your own family or circle of friends? I know that I can, and it can be extremely painful and disturbing.

Is there any hope? What can we do? Tune in this Sunday and find out!

Jill and I will give you our take on how to communicate more effectively with friends and loved ones in the next David and Jill Show! We will also highlight common errors that our podcast fan is making–and these are errors that you are likely to make, too!

Watch FB Live on Sunday, January 13, 2019,
at 3 PM (PT) for an hour with David and Jill!

If you join us live you can ask questions and make comments. However, you can also watch anytime later on since the show will be recorded and available indefinitely on my public FB Page.

Dr. Levitt is Director of Clinical Training at the Feeling Good institute in Mt. View, California. She is a co-director of my (totally free) weekly psychotherapy training group at Stanford, and is absolutely superb. When we work together, the chemistry can be pure magic. Contact us if you live in the Bay Area and would like to join our weekly group!

Jill and david 2

117: On the Path to Greater Intimacy— David’s Final Sparkling Interview with Stephanie James

117: On the Path to Greater Intimacy— David’s Final Sparkling Interview with Stephanie James

David with Stephanie James, Part 3, Intimate Relationships

Hi everybody!

I recently did two terrific interviews (Podcasts #92 and #111) with Stephanie James on her superb radio show and podcast, The Spark. Today, Fabrice and I are bringing you my third and final interview with Stephanie, as we describe how to convert conflicted relationships into loving, rewarding ones.

Stephanie said it was her favorite interview, although all three were really fun for me. Today you will once again hear how dynamic, warm and positive she is!

My first interview with Stephanie was on the amazing inner power we all have to change our thoughts, feelings, actions, and lives. We talked about how to transform your automatic negative thoughts and create a more joyful present and a more fulfilling future.

My second interview with Stephanie was on the evolution of traditional Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) into the new TEAM-CBT. We highlighted the amazing new motivation-busting techniques that can lead to extraordinarily rapid recovery.

Stephanie also recently interviewed our beloved colleague, Dr. Matthew May, a psychiatrist who is a phenomenal TEAM therapist. Click here if you’d like to take a look and listen. Matt has worked with Fabrice and me on our podcasts–you may remember the amazing and inspiring podcasts featuring live therapy with Marilyn.

Stephanie is a outstanding therapist and radio personality from Colorado. It was an honor to be on her show on three occasions. Stephanie is co-authoring a book on how to live a “spark-filled life.” It should be completed soon, so you’ll likely be hearing much more from Stephanie during 2019!

David

Dr. Fabrice Nye currently practices in Redwood City, California and works with individuals throughout the world via teletherapy (although not across U.S. state lines). You can reach him at fabrice@life.net. You can reach Dr. Burns at david@feelinggood.com. If you like our jingle music and would like to support the composer Brett Van Donsel, you may download it here.

* * *

Upcoming Workshop Schedule

The following schedule will evolve as I add new workshops or update details. Check back here at times to stay informed.

December, 2018

Brief Therapy Conference, December 6 – 9, Burlingame, California

Sponsored by the Milton Erikson Foundation

I will be giving a Keynote Address on

Overcoming Therapeutic Resistance

on Sunday, December 9, 2018, from  2:30 – 3:30 PM

plus a two-hour workshop on Friday, December 7, 2018 from 10:45 AM – 12:45, with Dr. Jill Levitt on

Healing Yourself: A Live Demonstration of TEAM-CBT

plus two other presentations at this fantastic event.

I’ll also be doing a “Great Conversations” dialogue with Dr. Jeffrey Zeig on the treatment of addictions and the incredibly important concept of non-linear recovery.

 

Subscribe

Dr. Fabrice Nye currently practices in Redwood City, California and treats individuals throughout the world via teletherapy. You can reach him at fabrice@life.net. You can reach Dr. Burns at David@feelinggood.com.

* * *

Three Cool Upcoming Workshops for YOU!

Coming Really Soon!

Act fast if you want to attend.

1.   TEAM-CBT Methods for the Treatment of Relationship Difficulties

Step by Step Training for Therapists

by David Burns, MD and Jill Levitt, PhD

Sunday October 28th, 2018 (8:30 am-4:30 pm PST)

Live in Palo Alto plus online streaming

Learn how to reduce patient resistance and boost motivation to change. Master skills that will enhance communication skills and increase intimacy with loved ones. This workshop will be highly interactive with many case examples and opportunities for practice using role plays.

Learn how to reduce patient resistance and boost motivation to change. Master skills that will enhance communication skills and increase intimacy with loved ones. This workshop will be highly interactive with many case examples and opportunities for practice using role plays.

Join us for a day of fun and inspiring learning from anywhere in the world.

The in person version is now sold out,  but limited spaces are still available if you would like to join online. There will be experts to assist the online participants with small group exercises in break out rooms, so you will have the same experience as those who attend in person. But act fast it you want to be included!

SOLD OUT in person, but limited spaces are
still available ONLINE

Learn from David and Jill–a dynamic teaching duo!

7 CE*s. $135

To register, go to the Feeling Good Institute

* * *

2. Rapid Recovery from Trauma

a two-day workshop

by David D. Burns, MD

November 1-2, 2018–Woodland Hills, CA

You can attend in person or from home via Live Streaming

Includes a dramatic live demonstration on the evening of day 1

For further information, go to www.IAHB.org
or call 1-800-258-8411

Register Now!

* * *

3. TREAT ANXIETY FAST–

Powerful, Fast-Acting, Drug-Free Techniques 
to Defeat Anxiety & Worry

a 2-day workshop by David D. Burns, MD

November 29 and 30, 2018: San Francisco, CA
(in person only)

and

December 3 and 4, 2018: Portland, Oregon
(in person and live streaming)

PESI is proud to offer an exciting workshop by David Burns, M.D., a pioneer in the development of cognitive behavior therapy (CBT). Achieve rapid and lasting recovery with all your anxious clients, just as Dr. Burns has done in over 35,000 therapy sessions with severely troubled clients. Become skilled at treating every type of anxiety without drugs.

In this unique 2-day certificate course you’ll master more than 20 treatment techniques to help your clients eliminate the symptoms of anxiety quickly – even your most challenging, resistant clients.

Dr. Burns will illustrate concrete strategies that provide rapid, complete recovery and lasting change for your patients. You’ll learn…

  • How to integrate four powerful treatment models to eliminate symptoms.
  • How to enhance your client’s engagement in therapy.
  • How to develop a treatment plan that specifically targets each client’s unique problems and needs.
  • …and so much more!

David will provide you with guided instruction and share powerful video sessions that capture the actual moment of recovery. You will take away practical strategies to use immediately with any anxious client. Leave this certificate course armed with tools you can use in your very next session!

Don’t miss this opportunity to learn from one of America’s most highly acclaimed teachers!

Sponsored by PESI

To register, or for more information, call: 800-844-8260

 

Only a Few Online Slots Available for David and Jill’s Relationship Workshop!

Only a Few Online Slots Available for David and Jill’s Relationship Workshop!

TEAM-CBT Treatment of Relationship Difficulties

Step by Step Training for Therapists

by David Burns, MD and Jill Levitt, PhD

Sunday October 28th, 2018 (8:30 am-4:30 pm PST)

Coming this Sunday!

Sold Out in Person and only a few spaces
still available for online streaming.

If you join online, there will be experts available
to assist in small group exercises in breakout rooms.

This brief, dynamic video with Richard Lam and Mike Christensen explains how the online streaming will work–

 

 

Learn how to reduce patient resistance and boost motivation to change. Master skills that will enhance communication skills and increase intimacy with loved ones. This workshop will be highly interactive with many case examples and opportunities for practice using role plays.

Join us for a day of fun and inspiring learning from anywhere in the world. Learn from David and Jill–a dynamic duo!

We will include three role-play exercises for all participants to enhance your understanding and mastery.  We will have experts to guide those who join us online, with identical small group exercises for you in breakout rooms.

We will show you how to deal with therapeutic resistance which is often intense with individuals with troubled relationships. Outcome Resistance means that the client has mixed feelings about getting close to the person he or she is at odds with.  Process Resistance means that the patient wants to blame instead of examining his or her own role in the problem. You will learn awesome new tools to deal with both forms of resistance!

 7 CE’s. $135

Register NOW at the Feeling Good Institute or call  650-353-6544

Space is strictly limited for the in-person group in Palo Alto. We still have plenty of space for those who want to attend online.

I hope you can join us! Jill is totally awesome, and we always have fun when we teach together.

David

 

105: Ask David and Dr. Helen — Does Empathy Fatigue Exist?

105: Ask David and Dr. Helen — Does Empathy Fatigue Exist?

Back by Popular Demand—Dr. Helen

We have invited Dr. Helen Yeni-Komshian to join Fabrice and me for two consecutive podcasts on questions listeners have asked about troubled relationships. In today’s podcast, we address a question from Mary about how to deal with a husband who constantly complains and exaggerates how awful things are at work, in politics, and in the world. But when Mary tries to dismiss his statements in an effort to “keep the peace,” it just gets worse. His complaints escalate!

This is a common problem and you may have run into it as well. Do you have a friend or family member who loves to complain? And have you noticed that your attempts to help or point out the irrationality of his or her complaints are futile? So what SHOULD you do? What’s the secret of dealing with a whiner or a complainer? Is it even possible.

Helen and David provide a myriad of information and describe techniques such as Forced Empathy, Interpersonal Decision Making, Changing the Focus, and the Five Secrets of Effective Communication. You’ll LOVE this lively dialogue!

For more information on healing troubled relationships, you can read my book, Feeling Good Together, which is available as a paperback on Amazon. In addition, you can listen to our previous podcasts on the Five Secrets of Effective Communication, beginning with Podcast #65 (Enjoy Greater Intimacy) and several of the podcasts that follow.

More relationship questions answered next week. See you then!

David

PS: Listeners who wish to contact Dr. Helen can do so via email: helen at dryeni.com. You can also visit her website, www.dryeni.com.

PPS: In Episode #101 of this podcast, David responded to Dr. Michael Edelstein and Tommy Bateman on their challenge of the TEAM-CBT model vs. REBT. David was invited to be interviewed on their YouTube channel, The REBT Advocate and used his own effective communication skills to answer the challenge in Episode 35 of The REBT Advocate. You might want to listen to it.

 

Coming Up Soon–

TEAM-CBT Methods for the Treatment of Relationship Difficulties

Step by Step Training for Therapists

by David Burns, MD and Jill Levitt, PhD

Learn how to reduce patient resistance and boost motivation to change. Master skills that will enhance communication skills and increase intimacy with loved ones. This workshop is highly interactive with many case examples and opportunities for practice using role plays.

Join us for a day of fun and inspiring learning on site in Palo Alto OR online from anywhere in the world by this dynamic teaching duo!

Sunday October 28th, 2018 (9am-4pm PST) 6 CE*s. $135

To register, go to Feeling Good Institute

or call  650-353-6544 

* * *

Rapid Recovery from Trauma

a two-day workshop

by David D. Burns, MD

October 4-5, 2018–Woodland Hills, CA

and

November 1-2, 2018–Pasadena, CA

The November workshop includes Live Streaming
if you cannot attend in person)

For further information, go to www.IAHB.org
or call 1-800-258-8411

Register Now!

 

Subscribe

 

098: Live Session with Lee, Part 3: The Rebirth

098: Live Session with Lee, Part 3: The Rebirth

 

The last of 3 podcasts illustrating
the TEAM treatment model for a relationship conflict

With Drs. David Burns and Fabrice Nye, and special guest Dr. Jill Levitt,
Director of Training at the Feeling Good Institute in Mtn. View, California

In this final podcast featuring the TEAM therapy session with Lee, David and Jill do M = Methods, and show Lee how to respond to his wife more skillfully, using the Five Secrets of Effective Communication. Like everyone who is trying to learn the Five Secrets, Lee struggles with several blind spots:

  • “I Feel” Statements. Lee has tremendous difficulties sharing his feelings openly, in a respectful manner. He seems indoctrinated with the cultural idea that men should not be vulnerable and express feelings.
  • Lee makes the common error of “problem solving” instead of asking his wife to share more of her feelings.
  • Lee makes another common error of apologizing and using the trite phrase “I’m sorry” instead of encouraging his wife to open up. David discusses the different between dysfunctional and effective apologies.

David and Jill do lots of role-play practice with Lee and give him a homework assignment.

T = Testing. After the session is over, Lee completes the Brief Mood Survey again. His scores indicated that his feelings of  anxiety and anger have completely disappeared, and he also has a perfect score  Positive Feelings Survey and the Relationship Satisfaction Scale. He also gave David and Jill perfect scores on the Empathy and Helpfulness scales and wrote what he liked the best about the session:

“My epiphany came at the moment I realized I had been afraid of emasculating myself and realizing that my vision of what a “man” should be was completely inaccurate.”

At the end, Jill reads an emotional email from Lee describing how he relapsed and started arguing with his wife, and then remembered to empathize use the Five Secrets instead, with an amazing result!

Subscribe

Lee Davy is the creator and founder of “The Truth about Alcohol.” He offers free weekly webinars for people who need help and support with their drinking. Check it out!

Attend my 2018 Summer Intensive in San Francisco!

This year, I am again offering my annual SF summer intensive in August at the South San Francisco Conference Center. This four-day intensive is almost always my most exciting and rewarding workshop of the year.

Here are the details:

David’s TEAM-CBT Summer Intensive

August 6 – 9, 2018, South San Francisco Conference Center, California

For more information, click here, or call IAHB.org at 800-258-8411

Here are just a few of the really cool things about this intensive:

  • You will have the chance to practice techniques in small groups after I demonstrate each technique with a live demonstration in the front of the room.
  • You will get immediate feedback and personal grooming from me and from many of my colleagues from my weekly TEAM-CBT training group at Stanford. They’ll be there to help you, and I’ll be there to help you, too!
  • There will be a live demonstration on the evening of day 1. The amazing Dr. Jill Levitt will be my co-therapist. Last year’s live demonstration, and in fact all of them in recent years, have been jaw-dropping and incredibly inspirational!
  • You’ll get a chance to practice TEAM-CBT in real time the evening of day 3. This will be an incredibly challenging but rewarding “solo flight.”
  • You will be able to do your own personal work on the last day of the workshop using the Externalization of Voices and Acceptance Paradox. In previous workshops, at least 60% of the participants indicated they experienced jubilant enlightenment during this exercise. Their fears and insecurities suddenly vanished!
  • You’ll learn how to do Relapse Prevention Training (RPT).
  • You’ll learn how to improve your empathy skills.
  • You’ll learn tons of powerful cognitive, behavioral, and motivational treatment techniques for depression and all of the anxiety disorders.
  • You will have the abundant opportunities to schmooze with colleagues, network, and have fun.
  • You will have two fabulous free luncheon banquets featuring talks by Sunny Choi, LCSW, who is using TEAM-CBT successfully with an underserved population in primary care with limited resources and language skills (“I must apologize for my success.”), and the wonderful Vandana Aspen, PhD, who will speak on “New Treatment Strategies for Eating Disorders.”)
  • And much more.

If you can only attend one of my workshops this year, the South San Francisco August intensive is the one to attend!

 

097: Live Session with Lee: The Death of the Ego

097: Live Session with Lee: The Death of the Ego

Part 2 of 3 podcasts illustrating the TEAM treatment model for a relationship conflict

With Drs. David Burns and Fabrice Nye, and special guest Dr. Jill Levitt,
Director of Training at the Feeling Good Institute in Mtn. View, California

Lee suddenly discovers the answer to his question:
Why is my wife so critical and controlling

David and Jill do A = (Paradoxical) Agenda Setting with Lee, starting with the Invitation: Jill asks Lee if he wants help with the relationship conflict, and if this would be a good time to roll up our sleeves and get to work. Lee indicates that he does want help.

They review the first two steps of his Relationship Journal, where Lee had recorded one specific thing his wife said to him, and exactly what he said next. Here’s what he wrote down:

Step 1 – She said: Write down exactly what the other person said. Be brief:

I was trying to convince my 18-month-old daughter to put her pajamas on. I was calm. Eventually, I raised my voice an octave or two and in a stern voice I told my daughter to put her pajamas on.

Afterwards, Liza said, “I don’t think you need to use that tone with a small child.”

Step 2 – I said: Write down exactly what you said next. Be brief:

I said, “I don’t think there was anything wrong with what I did. You can be stern without losing your shit*. There are times when she needs to know I am serious and not messing about anymore.”

It then devolved into a debate over a clash of values on how to raise our daughter.

* Transcribed as-is from Lee’s Relationship Journal.

Lee also circled all the emotions he thought she was having, along with all of the emotions he was having. He thought she was feeling:

  • Sad and unhappy
  • Anxious and worried
  • Rejected and alone
  • Discouraged, pessimistic, and despairing
  • Frustrated and stuck
  • Angry, annoyed, irritated and upset
  • Other feelings: troubled, defensive, dismayed, downhearted, and disconnected

Here’s how he was feeling:

  • Unhappy
  • Anxious and worried
  • Guilty, remorseful, bad and ashamed
  • Inferior, inadequate, defective and incompetent
  • Embarrassed, foolish and self-conscious
  • Hopeless, discouraged and despairing
  • Frustrated
  • Angry, mad, resentful, annoyed, irritated, upset and furious
  • Other feelings: hostile, loud, critical, agitated, defensive, stubborn, exasperated, sarcastic, powerless, diminished, low, resistant, confused, judgmental, vulnerable, inept

Step 3. Good vs. Bad Communication. When David and Jill ask Lee to examine his response to his wife, he had to admit that his response in Step 2 had all the characteristics of bad communication—he did not acknowledge any of her feelings, he did not share his own, and he did not convey love and respect. This was disturbing and surprising to Lee.

Step 4. Consequences. When David and Jill asked Lee to examine the impact of what he said to his wife, they suddenly ran into a wall of resistance, which is almost universal in relationship work. The Relationship Journal is an incredibly powerful tool, and it can be extremely painful because you have to stop blaming the other person and examine your own role in the relationship.

Lee suddenly and painfully discovered the answer to his question of why his wife was so controlling and critical of him—it was NOT because of the influence of her mother, but rather because he was forcing her to treat him like that almost every time he interacted with her.

This insight cannot be denied when you do the Relationship Journal, and it’s potentially incredibly empowering, but it can be incredibly painful at the same time.

You will also hear a masterful and paradoxical response by Dr. Levitt when Lee resists—and as a result, his resistance suddenly disappears, and he jumps on board! 

Subscribe

Lee Davy is the creator and founder of “The Truth about Alcohol.” He offers free weekly webinars for people who need help and support with their drinking. Check it out!

Attend my 2018 Summer Intensive in San Francisco!

This year, I am again offering my annual SF summer intensive in August at the South San Francisco Conference Center. This four-day intensive is almost always my most exciting and rewarding workshop of the year.

Here are the details:

David’s TEAM-CBT Summer Intensive

August 6 – 9, 2018, South San Francisco Conference Center, California

For more information, click here, or call IAHB.org at 800-258-8411

Here are just a few of the really cool things about this intensive:

  • You will have the chance to practice techniques in small groups after I demonstrate each technique with a live demonstration in the front of the room.
  • You will get immediate feedback and personal grooming from me and from many of my colleagues from my weekly TEAM-CBT training group at Stanford. They’ll be there to help you, and I’ll be there to help you, too!
  • There will be a live demonstration on the evening of day 1. The amazing Dr. Jill Levitt will be my co-therapist. Last year’s live demonstration, and in fact all of them in recent years, have been jaw-dropping and incredibly inspirational!
  • You’ll get a chance to practice TEAM-CBT in real time the evening of day 3. This will be an incredibly challenging but rewarding “solo flight.”
  • You will be able to do your own personal work on the last day of the workshop using the Externalization of Voices and Acceptance Paradox. In previous workshops, at least 60% of the participants indicated they experienced jubilant enlightenment during this exercise. Their fears and insecurities suddenly vanished!
  • You’ll learn how to do Relapse Prevention Training (RPT).
  • You’ll learn how to improve your empathy skills.
  • You’ll learn tons of powerful cognitive, behavioral, and motivational treatment techniques for depression and all of the anxiety disorders.
  • You will have the abundant opportunities to schmooze with colleagues, network, and have fun.
  • You will have two fabulous free luncheon banquets featuring talks by Sunny Choi, LCSW, who is using TEAM-CBT successfully with an underserved population in primary care with limited resources and language skills (“I must apologize for my success.”), and the wonderful Vandana Aspen, PhD, who will speak on “New Treatment Strategies for Eating Disorders.”)
  • And much more.

If you can only attend one of my workshops this year, the South San Francisco August intensive is the one to attend!

 

How to Develop Stronger, Deeper Relationships with Clients, Colleagues, and Loved Ones*

How to Develop Stronger, Deeper Relationships with Clients, Colleagues, and Loved Ones*

Hi everybody!

I have a really great new workshop coming up on

June 15th, 2018 in Mt. View, California

9:00 AM – 4:00 PM
Michael’s at Shoreline
2960 N. Shoreline Blvd.
Mountain View, CA 94043

Sponsored by the Santa Clara Valley of CAMFT
(California Association of marriage and Family Therapists)

Unlike my usual workshops, which include quite a bit of didactic material and live demonstrations, plus some small group practice, you’ll get a great deal of practice so you can master new skills that can transform you clinical work and your personal life as well. You’ll learn to use the Five Secrets of Effective Communication to transform failed, frustrating relationships into satisfying, trusting ones, and you’ll get plenty of helpful feedback while you learn. You’ll learn how to develop more meaningful and rewarding relationships with your clients as well as the people you care about the most.

I’ll be joined by the brilliant and totally wonderful Kyle Jones, a 3rd year PhD student at Palo Alto University with outstanding clinical skills. Although I’ll be doing the main teaching, Kyle will back me up and help provide helpful feedback to all of you during the small group exercises.

In the morning, we’ll focus on dealing with challenging, difficult clients, and in the afternoon we will take on a far greater challenge: how to deal with challenging, difficult loved ones!

All of that plus:

  • Free breakfast
  • Free lunch
  • 6 CE credits
  • Lots of fun while learning!

Click here for registration and further details

Learning Objectives
At the end of this workshop you will be able to:

  • Use the Five Secrets of Effective Communication
  • Enhance your communication skills with the Intimacy Exercise
  • Transform hostile relationships into trusting, loving ones
  • Resolve therapeutic logjams and boost your therapeutic effectiveness
  • Communicate with individuals who refuse to talk or open up
  • Track therapeutic progress and assess the quality of the therapeutic alliance
  • Fail joyfully
  • Transform therapeutic failure into success

You will also learn how to deal with clients and others who are:

  • Complaining but ignore your efforts to help
  • Challenging or provocative
  • Unfairly critical of you
  • Narcissistic, controlling, or self-centered
  • Angry, threatening or violent
  • Resistant and oppositional
  • Overwhelmingly depressed, panicky, or hopeless

Hope to see you there!

Thanks!

David

Also coming in Canada in June!

One of my best two-day workshops ever!

“Scared Stiff–
Fast, Effective, Drug-Free Treatment for Anxiety Disorders”

A two-day workshop Sponsored by Jack Hirose & Associates

It’s just around the corner–Register Now!

June 4 -5, 2018 Calgary, Canada

June 6 – 7, 2018 Winnipeg, Canada

Mike Christensen and several others will be joining me at both locations to help out with supervision of the small group exercises. You’ll LOVE this workshop and you’ll learn TONS of powerful techniques to treat every type of anxiety.

On the evening of day 1 of each workshop, I will do a live demonstration with someone from the audience who’s been struggling with some type of anxiety, such as social anxiety or public speaking anxiety. Mike Christensen will be my to-therapist. The live work is nearly always the highlight of this workshop.

You’ll learn how to heal your clients and your own feelings of insecurity and self-doubt as well. In fact, on the afternoon of day 2, I will catapult at least two-thirds of the audience into a state of euphoric enlightenment. You can’t beat that!

I greatly appreciate your support, and hope you will continue to spread the word about TEAM-CBT and www.feelinggood.com. i am trying hard to reach as many people as possible with my free programming and blogs designed to help individuals struggling with depression, anxiety, relationship conflicts, and habits and addictions, as well as the therapists who treat them!

David

* Copyright © 2018 by David D. Burns, MD.

 

 

 

Intimacy Training, Part 1, on Mother’s Day!

Intimacy Training, Part 1, on Mother’s Day!

Happy Mother’s Day!

Watch the FB Live Broadcast
on Sunday, May 13th, 2018, at 3 PM (Pacific Time)–

Intimacy Training, Part 1: How to Handle Criticism

Hi all!

First, Happy Mother’s Day to all of our wonderful mothers! We love you and appreciate all that you do, both for your families, and also in your professional work as well! I hope you are pampered and loved on this Mother’s Day, and every day!

On this Mother’s Day, Jill, Mike and I will launch the first of several Facebook Sunday broadcasts on Intimacy Training. You will learn how to improve your relationships with family, friends, patients, colleagues and strangers, and also how to attract a mate if you are single and lonely.

How to Enhance Intimacy

The first show, on Mother’s Day, will focus on how to deal with criticism, using the Five Secrets of Effective Communication, especially the totally amazing Disarming Technique. We will demonstrate how to respond skillfully to the most extreme criticisms therapists might hear from angry, dissatisfied patients. We will also show you how you can respond skillfully to criticisms you might hear from friends or family members.

If you plan to attend live, you can type in a criticism you have had trouble responding to effectively, and we will demonstrate how to respond, using role-playing. But please limit the criticisms to one sentence, such as:

  • You never listen!
  • You don’t really care about me!
  • Why do you have to be SO controlling?
  • You always have to be right!
  • You’re a jerk!
  • You’re not helping me!
  • This is all your fault!

Future FB Broadcasts will focus on other common relationship problems, such as how to GIVE criticisms and express angry feelings constructively.

Your textbook for the broadcasts on enhancing intimacy will be my book, Feeling Good Together, which you can purchase at Amazon.com. Make sure you do the written exercises while you read!

How to Find Love

There’s another important aspect of Intimacy Training: How can you find someone to love in the first place? When I was in private practice, more than 50% of my patients were not involved in a loving relationship. Some had been divorced, and did not know how to get back into the dating scene, and others had never been comfortable or successful with the dating scene, and had never found someone to love.

We’ll cover the ins and outs of dating, with a focus on hustling, flirting and making connections, including topics such as:

  • how to deal with people who give you the run-around
  • how to avoid chasing and getting dumped
  • how to make people chase you
  • how to make the first “move” with someone you’re attracted to
  • how to flirt
  • how to handle rejection.

I will be joined by a number of guest experts on these broadcasts on how to play the dating game to win. They will include the incredible Kyle Jones, a doctoral student at Palo Alto University, and the amazing Angela Krumm, PhD, the director of the TEAM-CBT certification program at the Feeling Good Institute in Mt. View, California, as well as others.

Your textbook for these shows will be my book, Intimate Connections, which you can order at Amazon.com. Many people have approached me at workshops to say, “Dr. Burns, because of your book, Intimate Connections, I’m now married!” If you’re feeling lonely, this might just be the book for you!

So whether you are alone and looking for someone to date, or troubled by a conflict with someone you care about, we will have TONS of cool methods to share with you!

Hope to see you this Sunday!

PS There will be NO FB SHOW on May 20th, since that will be my full day workshop with Jill Levitt, PhD! See below!

David

Some Cool Upcoming Workshops

Coming next Sunday, May 20th! Act fast if you want to register!

May 20th, 2018  Advanced, High-Speed CBT for the Treatment of Depression and Anxiety A one day workshop by Drs. David Burns and Jill Levitt. 6 CE Credits, $135
You can join in person or online from wherever you live! Click here for registration information.

There are no spots left for the live workshop in Palo Alto, but we still have room for you to join us online. Mike Christensen and others will be available to help those who join online with the small group exercises in “virtual” rooms. In this workshop, you’ll have the chance to personal work, so you can boost your own feelings of confidence and self-esteem while at the same time learning tons of new tools that will greatly boost your clinical effectiveness!

Coming in June! One of my best two-day workshops ever!

“Scared Stiff: Fast, Effective Treatment for Anxiety Disorders”
a two-day workshop Sponsored by Jack Hirose & Associates
June 4 -5, 2018 Calgary, Canada
June 6 – 7, 2018 Winnipeg, Canada

Mike Christensen and several others will be joining me at both locations to help out with supervision of the small group exercises. You’ll LOVE this workshop and you’ll learn TONS of powerful techniques to treat every type of anxiety. You’ll learn how to heal your clients and your own feelings of insecurity and self-doubt as well! And I’ll do a live demonstration at each location, to add some drama, illumination, and inspiration. Should be exciting! Hope you can join us!

I greatly appreciate your support, and hope you will continue to spread the word about TEAM-CBT and www.feelinggood.com. i am trying hard to reach as many people as possible with my free programming and blogs designed to help individuals struggling with depression, anxiety, relationship conflicts, and habits and addictions, as well as the therapists who treat them!

David